The Meeting

What can I say? The first meeting with our IP's was awesome! As my husband and I were getting ready to meet the,, the nerves took over. My husband pretended that he wasn't nervous at all, but as we approached the restaurant, he admitted he wasnt as calm as he implied. That actualyl made me feel better. People I had spoken with who had been through this process before told me if we are meant to be with this couple, the conversation would flow easily, and my fears would pass quickly. Before we even ordered lunch, I was calm. The IP's seemed wonderful. They seemed like people who could easily be our friends. The whole lunch was like a first date, a "getting to know you" meeting. The purpose for this meeting was far greater than just a fun lunch though. It was to see how all four of us got along. It was to compare our views and convictions on surrogacy and pregnancy in general. On the majority of topics presented, I know we all felt the same way. Above and beyond all else, I wanted to let them KNOW that if we were to go on to have a successful pregnancy, that from transfer day on, this was untimately their baby. They were going to be calling the shots in relation to the baby. The baby's health and all decisions relating to the baby were theirs to make. It was very important for them to know that I have had my children. I have had the wonderful experiences of taking pregnancy tests and learning we were expecting as addition to our family. I have had the joy of being the first person to kiss my newborn. I have been the first to feed my babies, rock my babies, and dress my babies. I am in this to give them a chance to go through these same experiences, to get to do those firsts.

All three of my pregnanies have resulted in healthy, full term babies with no post-birth complications. I have experienced "morning sickness" greater than the average pregnant woman though. Luckily, there is a medication that works well to keep the nausea at bay. I hope that if we obtain a successful pregnancy that I will not have anything but your average morning sickness, but I wanted to let the IP's know that in the past I have had to take this medication. Honesty is key.

The number of embryos I was willing to transfer was also of great importance to the IP's. IM is older than the average child-bearing woman, and therefore her doctor would most likely want to tranfer more than the typical two embies. This is something I had not thought if. Was I willing to "risk" the chance of quads? Even though the chances are extremely low, if four are transferred, you may get four. I did not give them an immediate answer on this one. I knew almost immediately how I felt about this, but I did not want to base my decision on emotion, so I told the IP's that I would contact them soon with an answer on how many I felt comfortable transferring.

On the car ride home, my husband and I discussed everything. We both felt the same way about the IP's. We would love to help them have a child. It truely seemed like it was meant to be. Everythng was falling into place. Have I mentioned that I have the most wonderful, supportive husband ever? Well, I do. He is my best friend, and the perfect companion, as well as a wonderful father to our children. Ok, I will get back on track now. We also decided that if the RE recommended it, transfering four embies would be OK with us. We wanted to do whatever needed to help them achieve their dream of a baby. So, keeping my health and the babies health in mind, we will see what happens!

The next step is for myself and my husband to have a psychological evaluation. We were fortunate enough to be able to schedule that for this weekend. After we get the pshych clearance, we will move on to our first appointment with the RE for our medical screenings and clearance. Then....on to contracts and we can get this journey started!!!